Where to look?

I started a new job this week in a small office. There is just two of us out front, myself and another girl a bit younger than I. Seeing as how we both were born and raised on this Island in the middle of the Pacific we know quite a few of the same people. It's bound to happen. She's nice and we chat while we are working. She is single, and has been for quite a while. Why you ask? This island makes it hard to meet people. I had to resort to online dating. She feels there are far too  many freaks out there. I absolutely agree, but I didn't know where else to meet men, so I had to weed out the freaks. So where does a smart, fun, successful, good looking girl in her 20's or early 30's meet a man other that cyber space? Here's some ideas for you ladies!

The Dog Park: Dog owners will talk to anyone, and it's automatically something you have in common so it's easy to break the ice. Don't have a dog? Borrow one. I'll lend you mine. You can tell that cute guy with the floppy eared Lab you'll lint roll the dog hair off him after dinner.

The Gym: Try to find a gym that does not have a separate mens/ladies zone. Go to a gym you know will have guys your age and check the activities calendar. Royal Roads University Recreation Center has floor hockey on Monday nights, it's jam packed with cute boys! Jump on the treadmill and ask the hottie next to you what he's got loaded on his IPod. Not feeling that brave? At least you've gotten a good work out and you'll feel good about your self!

Parties: I'm not talking about the average party at your friends house you go to every weekend, I'm talking the FaceBook invite for an acquaintances Birthday Party at the Karaoke Bar you would never go to. You will obviously know at least one person, but in true Vancouver Island style you'll more than likely know at least four people. You never know who may be there, and at the very least you'll reconnect with an old friend, and maybe make a new one!

In Class: I'm not talking College or University classes. But sign up for a class of some sort. WestShore Parks and Recreation has lots of classes, curling, aquatic kickboxing, intro to wood working and even a class on how to use your IPhone or IPod! What about taking golf lessons with Matt at Highland Pacific golf course? I love this golf course, you will too. Why not meet a man while doing something fun, somewhere fantastic and learning a new skill? It's an all around win!

Those are a few things I'd suggest, any other suggestions please feel free to leave a comment! Let's help all our single and fabulous friends find that special someone!

Happy Birthday Sea Breeze!

In February I said yes to every invite. I wouldn't have said no to my friend anyway! The plan was flawless, dinner at a steak house, a visit to the games room for darts and closing out the night with a session at The Fox. So, how did it go...

We show up, on time, for our reservation. Ric's Grill was not ready for us. The 10 of us had to sit on the 3 chairs in the waiting area while our table was prepared. We were not promptly greeted, nor offered beverages in a timely manor. When our lack luster server finally came to us I was starving, and when i get hungry, it's ugly. I ordered two beverages, one I requested with my meal and an appy while everyone decided what they wanted. The menu is great, lots of options and reasonable price points. We enjoyed the room while we waited for our drinks. Good thing its a nice room, the drinks took forever. So long in fact my appy arrived before any ones drinks. When our drinks did get to our table they were auctioned off in a cheap Pizza Hut "WHO HAD THE DIET?" style. Not the service you would expect. Both of mine showed up at the same time too, not as requested, brutal. The glass of sparkling was great ($7) and the Dancing Bull Red Zinfandel ($9) was, as always, adequate. My appy was delicious! Ahi Tuna Carpaccio ($13.95) seasoned with Cajun spices and a ginger wasabi butter. I couldn't identify the Cajun spice but the mild wasabi butter was great and complimented well with the capers. I would absolutely order this again. Eventually our mains showed up, you could see the servers counting seats as they brought the plates out. I was glad we had gotten passed the auction service. Sea Breeze's plate was delivered, upside down. Last time I checked the protein was served at six o'clock, not eleven forty five. Mine was presented as a Filet with Cognac Cream Sauce. I ordered a 6 oz Sirloin ($20.95) with Oscar Deluxe Topping ($9.95). The plate in front of me was obviously not a filet, they come wrapped in bacon. The lack of knowledge, enthusiasm and service standards was ridiculous. Glad to have what I ordered, even though it was delivered all wrong, I dug in. The scallops and prawns were great. The asparagus and other veg on the plate were undercooked. While I liked them that way I know some people like their veggies cooked, so just an FYI. The steak was small, and not medium rare, but rare. I like rare, so again, their screw up was fine by me! Our plates were cleared eventually by stacking them in one huge pile. I actually expected the server to scrape all the scraps onto one plate for the dog just like at Grandmas. I don't know about you, but plates should come off a table as they go on, one at a time! I have a Creme Brule fetish and when "super" server finally returned I requested some. He absolutely had no interest in selling us anything, there was not one offer of an additional drink so I was glad I ordered two right off the hop! The Creme Brule flavour was vanilla, while boring, I was looking very forward to it. About five minutes after ordering a random person we had never seen arrived asking who ordered the Creme Brule. I put up my hand, and he advised me they were all out of the Bailey's flavour and would it be ok if they served me Blueberry. Uh, NO!! First of all when did Bailey's happen?? And secondly, Blueberry? Ick. At this point I was thirsty, now annoyed and just wanted out anyway. Our bills took forever. We were very clear who was with who so it should not have been an issue, and they were all correct, when they eventually arrived. I filled out my service survey advising of my disappointment but I still tipped, hoping our server will now have enough to get on the ferry, move and go ruin someone elses night in another city. My total bill for myself was $68.15 taxes in plus tip. It would have been worth it had the service been remotely acceptable. Thanks "Matt". Ahhhh, moving on...

We Walked up to the Games Room at The Sticky Wicket at The Strathcona Hotel. It was so busy there was no getting a table! Saturday night in Victoria there really isn't much else to do so this was expected. Our attempt to play darts was dashed by the volume of people playing. We regrouped and made arrangements to head to The Fox for part three of the evening.

We found a table in the over full show room. The entertainment was good, company was better and over all I had a great time. I had the dogs in the truck so I left at a reasonable hour and went to meet TBM at the casino for a drink and some slot machine fun. This was my favorite part of the night. I was glad I went out, and I hope Sea Breeze had a fun Birthday.

I would go to Ric's Grill again, but in a smaller group. Maybe ten people was just too much for poor Matt. I'd like to spend a night in the games room too, it had a good vibe, so I'll have to make an effort to get there earlier one day. And every night at The Fox is a good one...so you know you'll see me there again! Happy Birthday Sea Breeze!! xo

The Ex Factor

Can you, and should you, be friends with your ex when you are dating someone new? Ask almost anyone, and they will say no. I say, it depends.

Reasons to not be freinds:

• It upsets your current relationship. I have a few ex's I am civil with, and when I am dating someone, if it makes them uncomfortable, I alter my interactions with them. I no longer call or text them daily, I don't have meals with them, and I make sure I let them know I'm seeing someone who I care about. It's a respect thing, and since I respect my current relationship I make sure I do everything to make them comfortable. 
• It leads your ex on. Until your ex realizes you are actually with someone else they think there is always a chance you'll get back together. This isn't fair to you, your ex, or the person you are currently dating. Being friends with them leaves their foot in the door, so kick it out.
• Poison.  Your ex knows you really well, and knows whats best for you, right? I mean, they put up with you and looked after you for how long?? Look at all they went through with you, why wouldn't they know whats best? Right? Wrong. Their opinion is just that, an opinion. And it should stay in their heads, and not be put into yours. You may say it won't affect your decisions, but honestly, it's poison, a slow acting poison working to ruin your happiness. And it's not just your happiness at stake here, your new relationship deserves more.
• It's hard to move on. If you have a constant reminder of all the happy times and laughs you had together you can never truly give yourself to your new relationship. Keeping the memories in the past, with your ex is the best way to appreciate what you did have, how it made you grow, and what you can do differently in your next relationship.

Now the good stuff, the reasons to be friends with your ex! 

• You want your ex back. So obviously you shouldn't be dating anyone else, should you?

Well as you can see I'm absolutely hell bent against being friends with your ex. I know it's a very small world and I am not saying don't be a total dick to them, I'm just saying don't be friends. Being civil when you see them in public is good, posting on their FaceBook profile weekly is bad. Asking about their family when you run into them is good, making a lunch date to catch up and fill them in on your second cousins hang nail is bad. You see where I'm going with this? If you really want to give your new relationship a chance, don't do it.